ICELAND DECLARES WAR

RED TOP NEWS FLASH

ICELAND DECLARES WAR ON UK

In the early hours of the morning Iceland launched an attack on the UK, which has resulted in the complete closer of UK airspace. The Prime minister spoke to the nation.

‘Today April 15th, 2010 a date which will live in infamy the United Kingdom was suddenly and deliberately attacked by the volcanic forces of the Icelandic Empire. The UK was at the moment at peace with that nation and was in conversation with its government about the repayments of money owned to us by the Icelandic banks’

The Red Top correspondent believes that this attack was in retaliation for Gordon Brown using the anti-terrorism laws to freeze Icelandic banking assets in the UK, during the 2008 world economic crisis. Negotiations between the two countries about repayments of the money are ongoing. Obviously Iceland in a desperate attempt to avoid repayment has declared war.

Our defence correspondent believes the attack was planned by Icelandic Admiral Bjork. Who sang to the Icelandic god of fire, ‘Frozen cheesecake £3.99’. Which then unleashed the ash attack onto the United Kingdom

Admiral Bjork’s plan seems to be to gain total air superiority over the United Kingdom and then drop deadly ash over the UK which will cause nasty smudging on people’s cars, which they had only just finished cleaning at the weekend.

 
  The Red Top will keep you updated during these dark days. We will be unbowed by the Icelandic Empire.

God Save the Queen.