GOD admits hacking 20th Century Fox
In a Red Top Exclusive God has admitted hacking into 20th
Century Fox film studios, because of their depiction of him in the Ridley Scott’s
latest film Exodus: Gods and Kings.
God spoke to The Red Top News and said: “I was outraged by
the portrayal of me in this movie, it shows me as some vengeful nutter, sending
plagues of Locust, turning water into blood and most despicable of all, killing the first born children of an
entire nation. During the period this film is set, I was at the time in fact designing Kim Kardashian.(I missed placed the
design and it took me 2000 earth years to find it again.) Anyway I warn those
people at FOX any attempt to release this film you will see them all get a
ticket to Hell. Running time Eternity with no popcorn!
(Ed. Apologies our picture editor seems to have left all pictures of Kim Kardashian on his home PC)
War on Terror Going well!
No really it is.
After 13 years of the war on Terror the NATO troops are
coming home. With all the blood and treasure spent (Ed. Err why do the media
use that phase “blood and treasure” as though we are talking to a 10 year old ?
What we mean is with all the dead and wounded troops and billions spent.) we look
back at how western forces have reduced the terrorist threat.
At the beginning
of the 21st Century the Islamic terrorist threat was a couple of
thousand men in the mountains of Afghanistan.
They were armed with small arms,
maybe a few millions dollars and training camps which looked a like an
adventure playground.
Now after years of warfare we have reduce them to this.
Wait hang on they have trucks, and err tanks!!.
And rockets
They now
occupy territory bigger than Wales!.
They are exporting Oil at a rate of a
Millions dollars a week. They have a better balance of payments than most Western economies.
Their social media campaign would put a lot of companies to shame!
Err we will come back to this one.
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When they are holding this, anything they say is no
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Bankers from Sinners to Saints ?
Nope it's a Christmas cracker joke and it is on us.
In 2008 the world economy just survived a nervous breakdown
in the international financial system. Trillions of dollars of tax payers money
was used to shore up the systems, leaving many nations with massive increases
in their national debt. (Ed. I thought that was caused by illegal immigrants living
on benefit street?!) We now look at how the last 6 years have progressed with
sounder more sensible financial policies as the banks have mended their earlier
ways of casino banking.
 |
| Pork scratching each others backs. |
Err well there were one of two minor issues.
1) Interest rates being fixed, the Interbank
rate was fixed, banks were shown to have colluded and carried out fraud to set
the rate for their advantage.
2) Then there was currency rate fixing where at
least 15 banks again colluded to discuss types and volumes of trades they were
going to make.
3) Oh and then there was the Gold Fixing err fixing scandal, where
the gold price was manipulated for the advantage of major banks.
So no change there then.
Merry Xmas from the Red Top News and Happy New Year.
